a post by Edie Weinstein for the World of Psychology blog
One partner in a couple who have been married nearly four decades, reported that she felt controlled by her husband. When asked if it was always the case, she responded in the affirmative and when taken a step further, and asked why she married him, she shrugged her shoulders and sadly said, “Low self-esteem, I guess.”
She admitted that their interactions over the years only served to deepen the divide between them. At a loss to know how to resolve her dilemma, she was willing to do what she could to establish some semblance of control in an otherwise untenable situation by working on improved self-care that could reflect how she wanted to feel.
Another woman who had been married nearly a dozen years and is now single, expressed that there were times when she felt judged and criticized by her spouse and was often hyper-vigilant so as not to incur disapproval. In symbolic conversation with him (since he was not available for a face to face dialog) she said she wished he had been kinder and more patient.
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