“The human mind is a relational and embodied process that regulates the flow of energy and information.” ~Daniel J. Siegel
We are emotional creatures, and we were born to express emotions freely and openly. Somewhere along the way, however, many of us learned to repress emotions, especially those deemed “negative,” in order to fit in, earn love, and be accepted. This was my experience.
I grew up in a home where the motto was “Children are to be seen, not heard.” There was little emotional expression allowed, let alone accepted. No one was there to validate or help us process emotions in a healthy way. Anger was met with anger, fear went unacknowledged, and there was plenty of shame to go around.
My parents didn't model how to deal with difficult emotions, as they struggled with that themselves. When those emotions showed up, I often felt overwhelmed and inadequate, ashamed of my failure to be a “good girl.”
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I have a friend who has had a lot of problems with processing his grief because his analytical mind blocks messy emotions. He doesn't even have the words to express some of his feelings. A good therapist is helping!
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