a post by Sharie Stines for The Recovery Expert blog [via World of Psychology]
Abandonment is one of the hardest experiences to heal from. It is a form of betrayal that leaves a person feeling bereft with grief. The grief process also takes a very long time to complete with abandonment; more so, oftentimes than in other grief experiences. This is because of the lack of closure, lack of validation, confusion, and sense of eternal hope on the part of the person being left.
If you have been abandoned, you may wonder how you can heal? What steps are needed to overcome the feelings of low self worth, guilt, rejection, and constant waiting for your loved one to change his or her mind?
There must be something you can do to help heal from abandonment; but, what?
According to Susan Anderson, therapist and author of the book, The Abandonment Recovery Workbook, there are different stages to abandonment – each part of the recovery process. The stages of abandonment are not linear, but spiral. You can experience all of the stages sequentially, concurrently, and sporadically. Recovery is occurring, however, at every stage.
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