Against Tolerance: The Ethics Of Empathy

an article by Rafaël Newman published on 3 Quarks Daily


“Quark”, photograph by the author, Bern 2018

I am employed two or three weekends a month as a minder or “Betreuer” at a treatment centre and halfway house for recovering drug addicts in Zurich. My duties include spending the night at the facility as the lone member of supervisory staff, eating meals with the clients, supervising their activities and accompanying their outings, taking urine samples and administering breathalyzer tests, distributing a variety of antidepressants and other prescription meds, and joining them for sessions of meditation and self-led group therapy.

Our clients typically come from the Swiss middle and working class, are predominantly white and “European”, and have in common with other addicts of my acquaintance a marked tendency to egocentrism and either a concomitant failure of empathy or, in reaction to the affective over-sensitivity that has come to be associated with addiction (particularly in the case of celebrity overdose victims such as Philip Seymour Hoffman), a self-protective closing of the border between self and other, whether by chemical, behavioral, or neurotic means.

Among my unspoken responsibilities as a minder, therefore, and in line with the principles of the self-help program that serve the center as an unofficial “philosophy”, is the performance of a living example: of empathy in action; of open-mindedness regarding others and their sensibilities or “struggles”; of humility and the will to serve, rather than simply to use, exploit, and consume. And as a consequence, the recovering addicts in my charge are, implicitly, to learn how to belong to a group rather than to go it alone, as they have been wont to do in active addiction.

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Addiction Recovery: Distinguishing 'Who I Am' Versus 'What I Do'

a post by Edie Weinstein for the World of Psychology blog



While speaking with a young woman who is newly in recovery with more than 100 days clean, the topic of change arose. She said that she was unhappy with who she was. I inquired further and asked what she was distressed about in her life. She went on to tell me her history and all of things she had done over the years that caused pain and sorrow, dysfunction and addictive behaviors.

We delved deeper and explored the catalysts for those choices. What became apparent was that she had internalized behaviors and saw them as a reflection of her identity. Her sense of self worth was in the basement, despite having turned her life around. She is not alone. This description could fit any number of people who find themselves on the upside of addiction.

She had determined that where she was heading was clearly not where she wanted to end up. I asked if she could tell the difference between who she was and what she did. Looking puzzled for a moment, she was able to share her finer qualities and still recognized the need for altering her self-perception and her relationships. I reminded her that even good people make poor choices that are not of benefit to themselves and those around them. Recovery encompasses far more than refraining from indulging in her substance of choice, but rather that “searching and fearless moral inventory,” Step 4 of the 12-step model. She had never had so many days of consecutive sobriety and never so much hard-won wisdom.

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